Organ donor?

The things you wish to not think about, must be spoken of.

It's important.

There is a child in a hospital with their parents hovering over them.  Their mobile phone is always charged, it is always in their pocket, it is always on the loud setting.  Waiting.. and watching their child fade away, dimly hoping that someone will save their child.

There is a child in a hospital sitting beside her father.  Holding his hand while he lays there sleeping.  Every now and then she runs her fingernail across his palm, digging in sharply.  She is hoping that he still flinches.  She is dimly hoping that someone will save her father.

There is a baby who hasn't yet see the outside of a hospital.  Parents that don't dare make plans for tomorrow.  Relatives that ask tentatively..

"How is ..."

terrified that one day the answer will be.....

"Dead."

One uncomfortable conversation with your loved ones.

Five minutes of your life...talking of something you hope never happens...

Could give someone else days, weeks, months, years.. with their loved ones.

A child could be spared standing at their parents graveside.

A parent could be spared the pain of outliving their child.

So get over the uncomfortable selfish ignorance of thinking you will live forever and "someone else" will help these people.... Start the conversation.  Tell your loved ones if you wish to donate your organs.  Remind them every year or so (we have this conversation about once a year - at least!)

Then when your mother/husband/children has to make the decision....  When the tears are flowing and they can't think straight... they will KNOW what your wishes were.

My entire family are organ donors.  Myself and my husband.. and our son. 

THAT was a tough conversation.

We talked about what would happen to him if we were both killed.  We talked to the people we hoped would take him on and raise him with the love we have for him... then we made sure the legal documents with our Will's stated our wishes and talked to our families about this.  Everyone knows what the plan would be..

We talked about what we would do if we lost our precious boy. 

The decision was easy.  We would be shattered yes.  Unquestionably.  But we both agree that we would save someone else the pain of burying their child.  The gift of life.  Light from the darkness.

Our families know our wishes.

Infact, Joe even knows what would happen.  He's an incredible little boy... he said it was amazing that if we couldn't use our bodies anymore that we could save someone else's life. 

He's even asked on occasion if we can save animals the same way....My mini Steve Irwin.

Make the decision easy for YOUR family.

Have an uncomfortable conversation.

Love,

Trine xxx

(Please check out my posts "I'm tired of 31 so lets get charitable" and "Upsize that donation!" - the draw is tomorrow and I'd love to get enough followers to put me over the $100 mark xx)

The small people are often more clever than us

This is beautiful and I just had to share it..made me want to go wake up my son and give him a hug..


"I loved you the minute I heard you were coming. I loved you the minute you were born. Then I saw your face and fell in love some more. You were only a minute old, but I knew I would die for you and to this day I still would. When you choose to have a child you make a conscious decision to allow your heart to walk around your body."

And..

--One day your life will flash before your eyes, make sure it's worth watching. --

This quote gave me a kick in the bum to be honest. How much time do we waste thinking about doing something but often never actually make that next step? So far, I've let too much of my life slide by just being not DOING....well, the time has come ladies and gentlemen... the time has come.

This book, is the start of my actually doing something. A thought, that had been sitting there being turned over and over for an age then finally, with a little encouragement, extracted from the dreamy area of my life and bought out into reality. It may be a hit and equally so it may be a flop. The process will not be easy, I'm sure I will encounter many roadblocks where I wonder if all the heartache and invested time is worth it. But nothing worth having or doing is easy right?

DOING and not dreaming or thinking is scary. This idea of failing is terrifying. But hey, we get one shot at this thing called life. Why not give it your all.... lets take a page out of our childrens book... kids will give everything their all without thinking of the what-if. IF they fail, they may dwell on it for a small amount of time, but it won't be long (I guarantee it) until they've thrown themselves head first into their next dream with just as much enthusiasm.

We can learn so much from our children.

From little things, BIG things grow!

It started as a good idea.  Formed in the back of my mind, constantly pushed aside because I have been "too busy"...  But then I scribbled on a piece of paper and it seemed do-able.  I spoke to a few people in not so confident whispers and they said "Do it, we'll contribute".  I posted in a forum I'm a member of and got a great response.  Then, somehow - it became real.

Some very exciting things have happened this last week.  I have been getting a several emails a day from people who are wishing (so generously) to share their stories.  Already, I have three completed stories in my hot little hands.  One is a 22 page journal which I am working my way through (box of tissues beside me) and will use appropriate sections of in the book.

I am feeling a little overwhelmed by all the support and peoples willingness to talk about the moments that changed their lives.  For every one of you that has shared this, has offered to contribute or are reading this now I thank you.  From the bottom of my heart, thankyou for helping me make this happen.


In the next week or so I will be popping a list of questions that you can answer if you are wanting to write but just have no clue where to start or what to say.  So keep your eye out for that.

Enjoy your night (go hug your children)

Trine xxx

A project with heart, requires your story.

My name is Katrina, though everyone calls me Trine.  I am 31 years old.  I am a wife and mother.  There is nothing particularily interesting about me or my life.  I'm a daughter, a sister, and aunt.  I have no particular talents that stand me apart from others.  I work two jobs, neither of them being to do with something I'm passionate about, but they pay the bills and afford me small amounts of time with my beautiful little boy.

Why on earth has someone so ordinary bothered to start a blog you ask?  Well, that's a very good question, and please - grab a coffee to wake you up and read on.  Please, I would love you to let me know what you think of how I'm spending my spare time.

I'm compiling a book and have thus far recieved quite alot of very positive responses to my project. What is it about? Righto here we go.......

I am putting together a book specifically aimed at people who have just been told that there is something wrong with their child - either during pregnancy or afterwards. Also including those that have been told early on in their pregnancy of a significant problem, then made the difficult decision to terminate and how they dealt with that on an emotional level.

I don't want to put together a medical journal - that would be missing the whole point. It is not to be focused on EXACTLY what the problem is/was in depth. What I want are a compilation of stories from the perspective of mums/dads/uncles/aunts/grandparents/siblings etc that deal with the emotional rollercoaster. I want raw, honest emotion. What I really want is to be able to produce a book for those people who are feeling incredibly angry/confused/lost/helpless but also the positive people who have taken the news in their stride and gone - OK, what do we do from here. I want mums and dads to be able to find a story they can identify with and hopefully - that lets them know how they are dealing with this hurdle is normal (even if they are laying in bed crying) and someone else has been there and gotten through it. I want relatives or friends to be able to pick up this book and understand where their loved on is right now and exactly what they may be experiencing. Because as you know, until you've walked a mile in someone’s shoes...

I want to hear exactly how people felt at THAT moment when you heard the news or felt themselves that something wasn't right (were you in denial, did you jump into action?) and then afterwards. How other people reacted, friends or family or just the lady on the street.

I was wondering if any of you would be interested in writing a piece for the book? There is no pressure or hurry - right now I'm not even past the touching base with people stage, though I have a number of people already writing a draft for me to work on :) I don't expect a whole books worth, this is to be a bunch of short stories not long journeys through your lives. You don't have to have your name attached (maybe just your first name or anon) I don't want anything prettied up - I've heard one lady say that sadly, for a few weeks towards the end of her pregnancy she hated her baby and blamed it for ruining her life (this didn't last thankfully) I'm sure she isn't the only one that has felt such pain and so alone.

Feel free to forward my details to anyone you think may be interested in participating in this they don't need to be a super writer - everything will be edited and chopped and fixed up later anyway and the end product will go back to the owner of the piece it for their approval. My email is katrinakruse@hotmail.com

I have already received some very positive feedback and I really want to get this off the ground. I've heard several people talk about how dark and alone they felt being surrounded by people who didn't really grasp the way it impacts your soul finding out that your baby is, although absolutely perfect to you, going to face such hurdles in their lives. As a parent, there are so many emotional responses involved in being given any less than perfect outcome for the little being that you want to see grow up, marry, have children, be independant, travel, have a career etc. We start out, upon finding out we're pregnant with so many hopes and dreams for this little person growing in our bellies.
I hope that we can make just a handful of people, feel a little less alone and give them the truth as to how a "normal" person has coped already with this verdict (or not coped either way..)

Please as I said forward my details to anyone you think might also want to tell their story bearing in mind it needn't be a deeply impacting problem - it could be something as simple as hearing difficulties, or resulted in losing your angel.

It's all about hearing a Doctor say something you wish they'd take back and how this changed your world forever.

Thankyou for reading this. I've also contacted many (many) different medical centers and support systems to try to tease stories out of people. If you know someone who may be interested in being involved - or you think their story should be told, please let me know.

Thankyou all so, so much. I understand this is a sensitive subject, and alot of people wouldn't like to discuss it. But sometimes I've found it's the stories that aren't told that are the ones that could help someone else to cope a little better. Pre my little guy arriving, with the losses I suffered I had never felt so incredibly alone, and so wrong to be so wishing I had died too. I felt that according to the world I should have just picked myself up out of the hospital bed and gone "meh... well, maybe next time" dusted my hands off and gotten on with life like it'd never happened.

If even one of you forwards this, or shares your story I thank you so greatly in advance!

Trine xxxx